View Full Version : An Interview with Ragnaros (Post Victory)

10-13-2005, 12:24 AM
The Man, the Mystery. Ragnaros.


Me: Why are you such a badass?

Ragnaros: I attest part of my badd-assedness to sitting in a pool of lava and not burning to death. You'd be surprised, but I have rather sensitive skin; and it takes a lot of chi to sit here and not 'feel the burn' as it were. You may wonder how I got here, but it's a long and drawn out story ... maybe I'll tell you later. Or maybe I'll just kill you. Anyway, I also get a lot of experience by continually owning large groups of people with no fire resist. Experience, and great joy. You should see my talent tree: I've got 5/5 in the talent Pwning Noobs.

Me: What do you do in your spare time?

Rag: I'm a big fan of macaroni art, big fan. Macaroni makes the best necklaces. I can't wear them, but they're pretty to look at. (He leans over, as though he could whisper) Did you know it comes in more than one color? I found that out the other day; blew my mind. I tried crochet, but I don't have the hands for it.

Me: Who is your role model?

Rag: The easy answer would be Richard Dean Anderson, but I'll go non-conventional and say, oh, Benicio Del Toro. Man, that guy is freaky looking.

Me: What Has Been Your Biggest Failure?

Rag: My mom would tell you dropping out of high school, and then I would tell her to zip it. Until now, my biggest failure was listening to my parents in the first place, telling me how important an education was, and how I could do anything I wanted, if I applied myself.They were right on one count, but I seriously doubt they possessed the capacity to envision the absolute magnificence I have become.

Me: What are the most important characteristics for success?

Rag: Anger, wrath, a huge flaming hammer? If it weren't for these things, I would never have become ruler of a huge cave full of epic loot and whiny little teenage adventurers scrambling after said loot. (I'm looking at you, Tenamike.)

Me: What were your parents like?

Rag: They were your typical workaholic, over-achiever types. Up at 4, in bed by 9, rinse, repeat. As such, I was a constant disappointment. It's not that I was averse to work, it's just...ok, so it was that I was averse to work. Anyway, my mom is a grade-school art teacher, my dad is an accountant, and we all know what I do. Doesn't really fit, but there it is.

Me: Do you have any siblings?

Rag: You would think my parents learned their lesson with me. And you would be right.

Me: A wife?

Rag: Nope.

Me: Kids?

Rag: Yep. Lots.

Me: Tell us about your kids:

Rag: Illigitemate sons are my specialty. They're on fire, and they all look pretty much the same. Other than that, there's not much to tell.

Me: What's with the horrible dialogue?

Rag: It's a deal my agent worked out. I'm contractually obligated to say those things so many times per "encounter". Funny story: during negotiations, we had some activist Christians trying to buy some space, but their price was way off. Be thankful you don't have to hear "God sears the sins from your flesh!", or "By Jesus, be purged!" a hundred times every time.

Me: Why don't you kill Corkorle more often? We'd like to see his repair bill higher.

Rag: Which one is he? You all look the same to me. You also all, generally, make the same sound upon obliteration. A semi-satisfying *splurtch* sound, not at all unlike the sound a wet sack of overripe peaches might make when dropped from a window on the 37th floor of a skyscraper. And Honestly, it's more fun to WTFPwn noob mages.

Me: Could you tell us a bit about your history with KAAOS?

Rag: Ragnaros 2342341442.5, KAAOS 1. Moving along.

No, seriously.


Me: Why won't Xia show us her breasts?

Rag: Are her nipples made of flame? No? Not interested.

Me: Why was it so hard for us to kill you?

Rag: Because "I rule j00"? But seriously, I started feeling a little sorry for you, so I decided to give you one. Pay careful attention to that; I said "one". I've heard the little phrases you kids use these days. I suggest you keep "farm status" in your hat for a while.


On to the serious stuff, we started off with the usual Majordomo ownage and tomfoolery. Novasuper was demoted in a fit of humor.


Tyo recieved his Eye of Divinity and rejoiced:


We almost gave up, we almost stormed out of Molten core in a fit of anger.... (You see, the instance got bugged just after everyone took their super expensive flasks.) But we hung in there, and with our next try we gotterdun.


http://www.mb2k.com/duvii/wow/tyokneels.jpg<----- Kneeling like every man should be!

Here's the loot:




(Coag got Bloodfang Pants (http://www.thottbot.com/?i=36929) - but I don't have a screenshot yet.)

Anyway, Cork has video, which he'll be posting.

Next stop: Blackwing Lair!

10-13-2005, 12:29 AM

Complain about the small size to Tyo! Its not my bandwith ;)

14 people died. Moving along.

10-13-2005, 12:32 AM
The important thing is that I lived.


10-13-2005, 12:43 AM
nice job

10-13-2005, 12:54 AM
Damnit! Just like Onyxia. I stick around for a few attempts, then you guys killed the big bad for the first time as soon as I leave!


Good job.

10-13-2005, 02:06 AM
Nice work people. Clearly Duvii is not getting enough dick in her diet if she has time to write stuff like this.

10-13-2005, 06:33 AM
Onto BWL. Rag got what he had coming.

10-13-2005, 07:31 AM
Much thanks to PandaPanda,Naked, and the Faustian Legend - Awesome work holding that aggro! Farm status incoming!!

10-13-2005, 08:22 AM
Dont Forget the Warlock DPS! Who needs rogues anyway?

10-13-2005, 08:27 AM
Bastard^ !!

10-13-2005, 09:52 AM
Much thanks to PandaPanda and the Faustian Legend - Awesome work holding that aggro! Farm status incoming!!

Actually it was Pandas and Nakedsnake that did a big chunk of the tanking. I held him for a good while when they were punted but got wtfpwnd in the first phase.

10-13-2005, 10:12 AM
Nice work people. Clearly Duvii is not getting enough dick in her diet if she has time to write stuff like this.

Kal = "not enough dick"

10-13-2005, 11:17 AM
Kal = "missing dick" :(

10-13-2005, 11:27 AM
Dont Forget the Warlock DPS! Who needs rogues anyway?

Somebody needs to keep you from getting 6k nuked!

10-13-2005, 11:47 AM
nj killing rag wish i coulda been there, damn schoolwork.