View Full Version : The Black Table Beer Run

Sul Morthos
04-05-2004, 04:29 PM

For some reason this made me think of Ego and cigars a few years back...

Who is up for some Olde English HG800 High Gravity Malt Liquor!

The HG800 High Gravity Robot is a titanium war machine, hell-bent on eliminating the impulses that keep humans from turning into savage beasts. After rubbing myself all over the only female in the room, I pulled out a switchblade, sliced the empty can and fucked the hole.

Rating: Unstoppable.

04-05-2004, 07:46 PM
Gah! I am unable to drink cheap beer anymore... a blessing and a curse! Guinness, Bodington's, an Indian Pale and a Scotch Ale by McEwan's, and some home brew by a friend of mine (a very good Guinness clone) stock my fridge at this very moment. I have 2 bottles of mead too, one 34 proof... mmmhhmmmm. That's like $75-100 dollars of future piss I will be flushing sometime soon!

But damnit, it tastes good the first time around!

04-05-2004, 07:57 PM
You know the irish send u guys across the pond the weak export stuff right? Irish Guinness takes 5mins to pull properly, and believe the adds when they say good things come to those who wait... farkin laaavly!

crap now I'm thirsty

04-05-2004, 09:55 PM
Ya, so I have heard... US Import Guinness is swill... and I heard the Irish drink Murphy's now since Guinness "sold out" and began mass producing, upping prices too, all over the world. I still like it as a good dark, though...

04-05-2004, 10:06 PM
Irish always drink murphys... I know a guy that drinks the black for breakfast though... god I'd hate to be that guys liver when he's 30

Stella is good though, one of my faves, next to bud, budweiser isnt as hard hitting but its so refreshing. I dont know if you get Carling over there in the US but thats another one of my faves.

04-05-2004, 10:22 PM
budweisser is considered piss water in the us

04-06-2004, 02:08 PM
Actually, the bottled Guiness (not the stuff with the Nitrous cansister, the glass bottle) is the same stuff they serve in the UK. It's about 2% stronger and thus has higher export taxes... thats why it costs more.

So, in Ireland they have different export tax structures than anywhere else. They tax on Alcohol by volume rather than just on volume alone. That's one of the reasons Guiness is actually pretty weak (slightly higher than Budweiser, actually). It's also one of the reasons that the Irish don't like the English. The English breweries are taxes only on Volume.

Traditional beers like India Pale Ale and Imperial Stout were traditionally shipped in concentrate and expected to be watered down once they arrived at their destination. They used that as a way to loophole the tax structure. However, the recipient geographies almost always "forgot" to water the stuff down. Thus the resulting beer styles are actually stronger than most other beers.

... Uh... nuff for now. I'm a beer nut.... I can talk your ear off about beer... but I try to keep a lid on the lectures :)

04-06-2004, 03:56 PM
Im having beer withdrawl since saturday. I drink beer like it's going out of style when I'm over in the UK.

We unfortunately don't get Carling in the U.S. .. which is one of my faves too. Stella Artois (sp?) can be had in VERY few select beer outlets here. I also love Kronenbourge (sp?!) beer too.. but.. same situation with Carling. It's crazy going around to all the pubs around the UK and trying out their 'special' ales, etc..

You guys try Chimay or anything similar? They typically have a higher alcohol content too than 'normal' beers and can be had in the USA. Those 'trappist monks' sure know how to make a good beer. :)

Val, you need to send me a steady supply of carlaing/kronenbourg :P

I'm a certified Master Brew Taster. :twisted:

04-06-2004, 09:02 PM
I've never tried Carling. Generally I'm a fan of John Courage when I visit the UK... I'm told it's concidered "standard" faire over there... but I like it.

04-06-2004, 09:12 PM
I'm told it's concidered "standard" faire over there... but I like it.

That just means UK beers rock! No shame in admiting that... the US has only glimmers of beery goodness... the micro brew glimmers.

04-08-2004, 02:18 AM
Never heard of Courage...

Well hopefully I can get myself a good quality fake ID made for when I visit the US in two weeks.

I really hate that... over here I'm a barman at the weekends
but over there I'm still considered too young to drink... :cry:
Somebody once told me that America was the land of freedom.

Or was it Amsterdam...

04-08-2004, 12:07 PM
It's the land of freedom unless your some fucking foreigner trying to drink up all our BEER, GODDAMMIT! GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY BEER!!


Yeah, it's a bit odd that we send people overseas in the army to kill brown people at 18 but don't give them beer til they are 21.

Such are the inequities of life.

BTW - John Courage is a London thing, I guess, but it's made by the conglomarate Scottish Courage (also brew Newcastle)

04-08-2004, 09:04 PM
Yeah, it's a bit odd that we send people overseas in the army to kill brown people at 18 but don't give them beer til they are 21.

If we gave them beer, they would have way too much fun! Wheeeee!